Here's the funny thing, the only person who will probably ever read this is my sister. I think that is supposed to say something about the person I am but if it does, that doesn't make sense. I see and hear people doing and saying awful things about other people all the time that I would never dream of saying or doing and somehow I'm sure I'm more lonely than most of those people. I don't know, I'm not throwing myself a pity party, I guess I'm just sad. And the truth is, I'm only sad because of a stupid dude. I didn't want to feel this way about someone again especially him but here it is. How is it that he loves me but when he's having a bad day, avoiding me makes it better. Some "love" huh? But I can't openly talk about this to anyone because no one wants to hear it. I'm just sad today I guess. Just like I was a couple days ago. Or a couple days before that. And then other days I'm just so happy and content. Just like I was yesterday. Or maybe a few days before that. I don't know anymore. I'm not asking for the kind of love that's there all the time. I just want a love that's consistent.

While I was listening to Nora Jones

The earth was dry and still the tsunami brought more harm than good, just as this Love will do for your lonely heart. To let the gap live would be the smarted move. To let the gap die, the simplest. But the void between these two isolated minds continues to grow insignificant. The satisfaction of today dominating the sense of tomorrow. Without fail, Love wins.

I have no idea why I did this tonight. I've never wanted a blog. I've never written anything like this before. I think I need some rest.